Melancholy.

I woke up in love but also wanting to die. Complete and utter disregard for my own life. My life is a melancholy drama and I’m tired. This is the dichotomy of life we must ride. I want to live? But death would be okay too.

11/10/2021.

I wanted to cut myself today. Thinking of you sliding your fingers inside me, violating my body gives me nightmares. No one imagines getting sexually assaulted on the first date. It’s not something I openly talk about you know? It’s not something I’m proud of. The shame follows me in every relationship I’ve been in,…

My Dirty Truth. 6-14-2021

I want to curl myself into the closet and lay there until the sun comes out. But I don’t know when the suns coming out. It’s been raining for weeks. I’m tired of living. I’m tired of me. I’m tired of being. No one understands how exhausting it is to fight with your brain 24/7…

Benign.

Sometimes I’ll trick myself into thinking I’m doing better. Sometimes I’ll be naive to believe I’m normal and thriving but I forget I’m merely in remission. The grief will cross its legs and sit benign inside my veins, coiling itself softly around my organs. It’ll sleep in the corners of my mind, waking up when…

Loss No Matter How Small.

It’s okay to miss him. Loss comes in waves. A loss is a loss no matter how small. You might miss him today; but this too shall pass. It’s okay to miss someone you loved. Heartbreak is heartbreak. You can’t put a time on how you choose to heal. “If you were truly great together…