The men with the sweetest personality always have the most bitter motives, and it’s vile. I’d rather deal with a blatant asshole, than the stress from a faux nice guy. Men wonder why women typically go for the men who are assholes. They’re honest with who they are, and their intentions. At the very least they don’t bullshit you into thinking they’re a decent human being.
I no longer feel obligated to give my time to those who simply want it. I’m not someone who’s easily accessible. My time is valuable and I don’t waste my energy on giving those my time that have shown me they can’t afford it.
It really took four text messages from me before you could finally respond? No one is that busy. People make time for what’s important to them. If I mattered at all, you would have made the effort to talk to me. Instead you chose to ignore me without any warning. It makes the whole thing really sad for you. The men who come off as good, and genuine seem to be the ones who let me down the most.
I want to act like you rejecting me didn’t hurt, but it did. I didn’t need you before and I definitely don’t need you now, but it still hurts a little that you just left. For someone who claims they value communication, you sure as fuck couldn’t communicate that you were a shit person. The men who claim they take communication very seriously are the usually the ones who will ghost you as soon as they feel it’s no longer worth it to acknowledge your existence. Every time I feel myself stressing over a man I remember there are millions of them out there that will do right by me, and I don’t need to settle over a man that chooses to ignore me.
I forgive you, not because you deserve it, but because I deserve peace of mind. You got my hopes up a little, and slightly crushed them; that’s okay. I dusted myself off, checked my lipstick in the mirror and fixed my crown. This happens more often than we like it to, but what is life without hope? What is life without a taste of optimism?
That’s the best thing about building my own home. It’s peaceful, full of compassion and love. It’s relaxing no matter who chooses to visit. When they overstay their welcome, I’ll always be home. I can never be alone when I always have me to come home to.
I’ll be friendly with you because that’s the kind of person I am, but don’t mistake my friendliness for friendship. At the end of the day, you chose to ignore me. You knew in that moment that ignoring me was going to hurt me, you decided in that moment I wasn’t worth a response, and you chose to do it anyway. And its that moment that I keep in mind. You didn’t choose me, and that’s okay. It’s okay because I’ll always choose me, and I know I’m a fucking delight.
Maybe one day I’ll find someone. Even if I don’t my home is beautiful just the way she is.